richmond birdwing butterfly

23 years ago, we are at the edge of the Kuranda Rainforest track. Outside, there is only glare and heat and damp. The morning sun bites hard and hot. The bitumen is sticky with heat. The air is so wet that I breathe heavy from the short walk from home. And the blazing song of a million million cicadas buzz, throb, and pulse around us.

Kirra and me, we carefully ease past a cascading curtain of wait-a-while, and we enter the forest.

We enter the cool and dark and quiet.

We enter the stillness of the forest.

I pause to breathe a few breaths and to be present, here.

Kirra wriggles off my hip and runs ahead.

In the heart of this forest there’s a spot where the Kuranda creek murmurs around a large flat rock, 15 steps across: 25 steps for Kirra. There are flay dry patches of rock and little pools, rivulets, and a deep crevasse where an eel may – or may not – live.

Kirra is playing in the creek, perched on the rock, writing on the water with her stick and counting taddies.

I lie on the cool cool stone to look up at the forest giants.

The giant trees, columns and canopy shade us completely: just a few slender rays of sunlight are made visible where they illuminate a leaf, a twig, or tiny floating particles of dust.

And rising between the columns, a cloud of Richmond birdwing butterflies, green stained glass, catch and reflect that sunlight as they circle and eddy slowly in a gentle updraft.

Photo of a male richmond birdwing butterfly resting on a stick, wings open.
Bob Decker. 2012. Richmond Birdwing Butterfly. CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

 

my xmas revelation

Yesterday I had a beautiful Christmas revelation.

I was beating myself up because even after all the Landmark, the nonviolent communication and the transpersonal philosophy, I was still experiencing some hurt over a little comment made by my mother.

For Christ’s sake – how pathetic – and when will I finally be enlightened!

I then imagined myself surrounded by the Xmas chaos, in the midst of screaming kids, barking dogs, people complaining about kids, dogs, and people complaining about kids and dogs. And people complaining about people complaining about kids and dogs. And there is me in the midst of it all – serene, calm, totally at peace with the world – present, but not engaging in all this icky messiness.

And I just started to laugh. I mean, as if.

I just had to stop writing and laugh again: Ho ho ho!

And then I thought We are spiritual being having the human experience. And I actually got it. I am just having the human experience. And just like a Contiki tour, this experience will include joy and pain, satisfaction – and so many regrets. Ho ho!

I am going to feel feelings – all the bloody time! I am going to try and grasp onto some of the fun feelings and give myself a bloody great rope burn even though I know better!

That’s what humans do!

I am going to run away from pain, even though I know that pain cannot be run from and that I am running in circles and will eventually trip over the pain and stub my toe and really have something to cry about.

Sometimes, being human hurts.

And sometimes I will cry. Sometimes I will curse. Sometimes I will blame others for my predicaments. And then I will get exasperated with myself for not being more enlightened.  And then I will remember all over again, and I will laugh. Ho ho!

What a ride!

Ho ho ho – Merry Bloody Xmas!!

Snail
Eli Duke. Snail. CC BY-SA 2.0

a bird in flight

a bird in flight that leaves no trace –
the touch of knowing does not grab,
but leaves things as they are

traceless bird –
to know you,
& leave you as you are

Source

“Like a bird in flight that leaves no trace, the touch of knowing does not grab but leaves things as they are.” (p 14.).

Puhakka, Kaisa. (2000). An invitation to authentic knowing. In Tobin Hart, Peter L Nelson & Kaisa Puhakka (Eds.), Transpersonal knowing: Exploring the horizon of consciousness. (pp. 11-31). New York: NY. State University of New York Press.

the old ones sing

the old ones
sing of
long ago

now –
as the
ash and
embers of our
fire
thread their
way to
sky and
stars

now –
I am
earthbound and of the
heavens

the old ones
sing

now –

In 2008 I attended a Women’s conference. The keynote and many activities were provided by the elders and supporters of the Kapululangu Aboriginal Women’s Law and Culture Centre. One evening some of us had paint up and danced a traditional dance. Then the elders sang around the campfire and we watched the ash and embers rise into the sky to join the stars.

transpersonal: a personal definition

trans•per•son•al 

(trænsˈpɜr sə nl)

1. extending beyond or transcending the personal. 

My hand is stiff and clammy from gripping the phone. I take a deep breath & I wonder, ‘what is like to be her?’

2. being or involving an altered state of consciousness. 

That afternoon, sitting on the front step beside an empty tab of Panadeine Forte & the dregs of a beer I feel the gut punch of her rage, loneliness, & fear. From miles & years away I hear her voice, quiet and calm like I have never known her to be: I do the best I can Rowy. That’s all I can do. 

Source 

transpersonal. (2010). Random House Kernerman Webster’s College dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.thefreedictionary.com/transpersonal

our sun

1.

at the

heart of our

solar system, a

yellow dwarf star, a

hot ball of

glowing gases

2.

its

gravity

holds the

solar system

together –

keeping

everything from the

biggest planets to the

smallest particles of debris in

its

orbit

3.

the sun

orbits the

center of the

milky way galaxy,

bringing the

planets,

asteroids,

comets and

other objects

along

4.

connections and

interactions

between

the sun and

earth

drive our

seasons,

ocean currents,

weather,

climate,

radiation belts and

aurorae

5.

the sun

made

life on earth possible,

providing the

warmth and

energy that

forms the

basis of many

food chains

6.

the sun and the

rest of the

solar system

formed from a

giant, rotating cloud of

gas and

dust, a

solar nebula about

4.5

billion

years

ago

7.

our sun accounts for

99.8% of the

mass of the

entire solar system

8.

the sun will

someday

run out of

energy

9.

when

the sun

starts to die, it

will swell so

big that it

will engulf

mercury and venus and

maybe even

earth

found poem from beautiful original material retrieved from the NASA website in 2017. NASA. Sun: In depth. https://solarsystem.nasa.gov/planets/sun/indepth

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